
...Breaking news:
Rain clearing, Saturday looking good for a nice bit of sunshine. The (fictional) Middleton Met Office advise revellers to: 'Wear a hat and drink plenty of fluids...' Naturally!
Our 'man-in-the-know' reports '...all buses fit and ready to tackle the infamous Rockingham - Cottingham hill climb...' before adding 'The Wheels on the Bus Go Round and Round...' Hmm!

Reports of an early morning explosion in the sleepy village of Middleton have been played down by Red Lion licensee Kevin Barby. 'It was just the Beer Talking' was Kevins somewhat 'enigmatic' response. Rumours that the Red Lion will be offering a free 'Beer-Shine Shampoo & Set' with every pint of Wot's Occuring this weekend have been described as '... absolute b*****ks'.
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